I have been married for almost 10 months. In those ten months I have learned a lot about my husband. I have also learned a lot about myself.
I have never been one to do well on less than 8 hours of sleep, nor without some alone time each day. I have learned I get really cranky when I don't get those things. I also don't do well on a budget. Or with farts and other stinky things. I hate that the dishes are never done, and that clothes are thrown BY the hamper instead of in it. I have learned that the one person I love the most is also the person that frustrates me the most.
In all ways I believe that my dear, sweet, artistic husband is right for me. I just sometimes question the smartness of it. I love him with all my heart, but at least once a week I want to punch him in the throat. Sometimes more than that! It's something that scares me. We are newlyweds! We are supposed to have sex a million times each day and be so mushy gushy with love and stuff. We can be. We are more often than not completely happy and sweet to one another. But man, those other times. I jokingly asked him if he was googling "abusive relationships" earlier after we had a fight. We both laughed. But honestly I think that for 2% of our week it is abusive. We know each other well enough now that we know how to cut to the bone. We know how dirty we can fight. We always skirt the really bad things. But after it's all said and done I think how awful we are to one another and can't seem to imagine us 10 years from now. I can't help but think how he always brings up that i think he's stupid. I don't know why he thinks that, but he does. It must be something that I've made him think though... That bothers me. I cherish my husband. And I know he is intelligent and witty and confident and amazing. I can't help but think I'm the problem when he says things like that.
I love my husband. Maybe I need to pray for a smaller temper; less of a loose tongue, too. I think he know where his faults are after this first ten months just as surely as I know mine.
I have never been one to do well on less than 8 hours of sleep, nor without some alone time each day. I have learned I get really cranky when I don't get those things. I also don't do well on a budget. Or with farts and other stinky things. I hate that the dishes are never done, and that clothes are thrown BY the hamper instead of in it. I have learned that the one person I love the most is also the person that frustrates me the most.
In all ways I believe that my dear, sweet, artistic husband is right for me. I just sometimes question the smartness of it. I love him with all my heart, but at least once a week I want to punch him in the throat. Sometimes more than that! It's something that scares me. We are newlyweds! We are supposed to have sex a million times each day and be so mushy gushy with love and stuff. We can be. We are more often than not completely happy and sweet to one another. But man, those other times. I jokingly asked him if he was googling "abusive relationships" earlier after we had a fight. We both laughed. But honestly I think that for 2% of our week it is abusive. We know each other well enough now that we know how to cut to the bone. We know how dirty we can fight. We always skirt the really bad things. But after it's all said and done I think how awful we are to one another and can't seem to imagine us 10 years from now. I can't help but think how he always brings up that i think he's stupid. I don't know why he thinks that, but he does. It must be something that I've made him think though... That bothers me. I cherish my husband. And I know he is intelligent and witty and confident and amazing. I can't help but think I'm the problem when he says things like that.
I love my husband. Maybe I need to pray for a smaller temper; less of a loose tongue, too. I think he know where his faults are after this first ten months just as surely as I know mine.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)